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Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Nervous. Who, me?

Yesterday morning I got up as usual and followed my normal routine.  Put my best friend Diggitty, a mini daschund, outside to do her morning ritual, turned on the coffee pot and sat down to see what happened in the world overnight.
It struck me how incredibly nervous I have been the last few days.  I really can't put my finger on the immediate source.  We all have drama.  Children to worry about (no matter how old they are).  A million things to do for the upcoming Holiday Season. It goes on and on.  Nothing has changed, so why am I  so nervous?
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks.
While I wait for Diggitty to come back in and the coffee to brew, I am thinking of the five hundred things I need to do.  
While I am in the shower I am thinking about what I will wear. When I am getting dressed I am thinking about feeding the cats and dogs and whether there is enough pet food to get through the week.  While I am feeding the animals, I am wondering if their water is okay or if the greenhouse needs to be watered.  While I am putting out fresh water and cleaning the litter box, I am thinking about what to eat for breakfast.
Let me tell you folks.  It is not yet nine o'clock and I am exhausted.
I sat down and tried to think of when I am the calmest. It is when I am either reading or writing.  Why?  Because you can't read and think about anything else and you can not write and think about anything else.
Ah, a clue.
There have been many books written about staying in the now.  They are good advice but I didn't heed them until this morning.  
Today, I got up, slipped on my bedroom slippers and made it a point to notice how comfortable they made my feet feel.  I carried by little friend to the back door and on the way I flipped the switch on the coffee.  Instead of obsessing about the events of last night, I stood at the back door and observed the dog as she did her walk about.  I kept my mind on her and what she liked to do.
Got my coffee and sat down at the computer.  I have two books going.  They are both good but one is lighthearted and one serious.  I enjoy writing one more than the other, yet I have so much time invested, I will finish both. But I digress.  While I was checking out facebook I made it a point to see my friends as they are.  Really pay attention to what they think was important enough to post.  Had to laugh.  Most facebook postings are frivolousness. 
When I took my shower, I took time to feel the water flow down my body.  I felt the shampoo lather in my hair and the sensation of the shower gloves on my body.  Okay. Maybe I sound a little crazy.    Yet  it is now nine o'clock again and I am going to try this for the entire day.  Maybe again tomorrow.  No phone while driving, no book while eating.  Just a day of paying attention.  
Will it help?  I will let you know.  I can say I am not as exhausted as I was this time yesterday.  And everyone else around here seems calmer also.  Humm.

2 comments:

  1. Hummm ... good advice! Experiencing life as it happens is something that helps keep me sane too. I know some would question the sanity thing. But, it makes me feel better and I more fully enjoy living.

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  2. Thanks. Sorry it took me so long to get back to it.
    Have a great Christmas and New Year.

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